Clubbing Isn't Me

I've come to the realization lately that I have grown out of the whole club scene on Second Life. It seems like clubs are now seen to me as chaos, crowdedness, and noise which I am not into it in the real world so why should I go to such places on here. This is not a new feeling to me since the way I have felt about clubs has pretty much spiraled down from the moment I left my club job as a dancer/hostess back in March 2011. Its not fun to go clubbing when you are expected to shell out tips of Lindens which you barely have. I hardly spend the Lindens I do have even on myself nowadays. When you come to the reality that if you save up you Lindens that you can trade it in for real money then you no longer want to throw Lindens around like it is pennies. Lindens are not seen as worthless exchange of money but pennies in the real world have slowly become a pain to have since you can't spend them on anything really. I work currently at least 18 hours a week modeling on here which only one of them actually pays me good. I've put in a few applications for club work in the past few months but now I have decided that I am not suited for club work. Never have I ever really liked those gestures that constantly go off in clubs. In the long haul, I find them beyond annoying which is why I hardly if ever use gestures and I mute gesture sounds when I can. I am a serious worker and that kind of worker is not welcome at club staff. Clubs like to have people who are full of energy, can deal with hearing the same songs played over and over again, enjoys gesterbating, and doesn't like to truly have a conversation. Don't get me wrong, I still adore this club who is like a second home to me on here but I prefer it when its not event time and its quiet. I'm a book reader and nature lover in real life where clubs and bars are so far away from me that you'd have to take a long airplane flight to see the distance I put clubs/bars from myself. Such places are just not for me and since I have blended Second Life with real life so much then I don't see the reasoning in doing things that make me miserable on here. Nothing feels worse than going to a club and feel like you being ignored by most of the staff because you are not in the mood to throw your hard earned Lindens to people. I happily tip a live singer and/or the venue because they actually play an instrument then sing songs that they wrote or songs which have touched their souls. Sadly, I don't feel DJs work super hard for their tips since I heard one DJ months ago even admit that they just cue up a player like SAMS then they let it play the songs. Also slowly DJs are talking less and less on air which only makes me feel like they going away from keyboard a lot while ignoring their patrons. The way I see it, more a DJ speaks is the more I respect them. Although I would never be a stripper on Second Life or real life, there is a lot of respect you have to have for them because they make you feel like your tips ain't being wasted by the long emotes they type out to show their appreciation. Gesturing to say "thank you for the tip" is not cool. I have come to prefer hearing my name over a stream saying thanks or get emoted in thanks when I do tip. When I was a hostess at a club, I always made every single person who tipped feel special even if it was only like L$20 but then I am a rare type of worker on Second Life. I have nothing against clubs. I simply saying that it not for me anymore.